the GIVE UP cycle

{"cover_pic":"https:\/\/cdn.stumagz.com\/images\/5da8b61e5c4e8stryimg","category":"Whats hot","is_vip":"0","title":"the GIVE UP cycle","title_id":"the-give-up-cycle","isEdit":0,"isAdmin":0,"authorFullName":"Muralidhar Sai","authorUserName":"muralidharsai","authorProfilePic":"\/\/cdn.stumagz.com\/images\/5c3f5df665ba1profilepic","authorMagzName":"MLRIT","authorCity":"Hyderabad","like_count":4,"cmnt_count":2,"type":1,"isApproved":2,"publishedInName":"MLRIT","publishedInLink":"mlrit","publishedInLogo":"\/\/cdn.stumagz.com\/images\/stumagzprofilepic","publishedInCode":"mlrit","country":"IND","keywords":"Like Tylenol: a medicine which can heal the pain. This place is a pain healer for me. To come over top of this small hill, one has to climb almost of hundred stairs. In middle, there are shops like canteen, Sports, Toys etc. There is a circular footp","isBookingEnabled":0,"privacy_status":"1","url":"https:\/\/www.stumagz.com\/the-give-up-cycle\/","has_form":0,"is_appln_closed":0,"max_no_of_applns":0,"likeStatus":0}

[{"type":"txt","id":"rich_1571337728714","data":"Like Tylenol: a medicine which can heal the pain. This place is a pain healer for me. To come over\ntop of this small hill, one has to climb almost of hundred stairs. In middle, there are shops like\ncanteen, Sports, Toys etc. There is a circular footpath where people walk and jog. It covers all the\nedges of the hill and there\u2019s a huge place inside the path where kids can play a lot of games. Inside it,\nbenches are placed here and there randomly. They say that the olds come up here to relax, adults for\njogging, teens to love, kids to play. But I come up here to know, learn, suggest and scold myself.\n\u201cYou\u2019re too slow. C\u2019mon grandpa! Only ten more stairs left\u201d shouted my granddaughter from the top\nstair. \u201cI know. Coming darling\u201d I shouted back. <\/p>After few seconds <\/p>\u201cSee. Your grandfather has not aged.\u201d I said. \u201cHa ha ha, remind me later, I\u2019ll laugh harder\u201d she\nreplied in a sarcastic tone and went to her friend and I decided to take a walk in the footpath. After\ncompletion of my walk I was searching for an empty bench to relax. I saw kids playing football then\na memory flashed in my head. <\/p>Six decades before, on one summer evening. I slipped and got my back hurt while kicking the football\nright here. My friends laughed at me and saw an embarrassing expression on my face and yet, they\ndidn\u2019t stopped laughing. I tried to stand on my feet, but I couldn\u2019t. One of them came and helped me\nto get up. \u201cOh buddy! Why did you do that? No one asked you to make us laugh right?\u201d he chuckled.\n\u201cPlease stop\u201d I replied with a fake laugh. He kept my left arm around his shoulders, brought me to\nthis bench and helped me to sit beside an old man, then went back to continue the game. <\/p>The old man seemed peaceful and he was keenly observing everything that happening around there.\nHe was holding a walking stick with his two hands by pressing it vertically opposite to the ground.\nHe had really cool specs which are similar to the specs where Clark Kent had them in the Superman\nmovie. Surprisingly the hair on his ears was longer than the hair on his scalp. Every inch of his skin\ngot wrinkled. Suddenly he turned his head towards me and said \u201cDo I look scary?\u201d in a grumbling\nvoice. I cleared my throat twice and said \u201cWhat? No!\u201d <\/p>\u201cThen why are you looking at me like that from the moment you came here?\u201d <\/p>Then I realized that he was observing me too. \u201cUh.. Nothing, I was uh.. I was just\u201d He raised his right\nhand little bit and said \u201cwait\u201d then looked at the sky and watched a plane flying over us. He slowly\nmoved his head above and above \u201cOuch! It hurts\u201d he cried. He kept his hand at the backside of his\nneck and turned back to watch the plane again. He watched it until it got away from our sight and\nhe came back to his position. <\/p>\u201cHow old are you kid?\u201d <\/p>\u201cFourteen. I have a question.\u201d <\/p>\u201cGo ahead.\u201d <\/p>\u201cWhy did you look at that plane like it was your first time to watch a flying object?\u201d <\/p>\u201cWhen I was your age, it is my dream to become a pilot. But I ended up as a bank employee.\u201d\n\u201cWhy? What happened?\u201d I asked softly.\n\u201cHah!\u201d he laughed and kept his walking stick in middle of the bench and then he continued \u201cThe\nthing is, we wait for the future we dream and are passionate about. But the truth is, the future we are\ngoing to have is waiting to depress or surprise us. Future is not what you think kid, it is what you do. <\/p>My father was a worker in a bottle manufacturing company. He started saving money for the\nadmission by working more shifts than he used to, when I told him that I want to do a degree in\nbachelor\u2019s aircraft operation. When I completed my twelfth grade he was affected by an infection\nand eventually we used all the money he saved for my education. But unfortunately that money\nwasn\u2019t enough to save him. He answered the call of death by leaving us. <\/p>Later I wrote some entrance tests and I got one, but we didn\u2019t have the affordability to continue my\neducation in that university, so I\u2019ve stopped my studies. After some days my mother suggested me to\napply for a bank job, so that couple of years later I would have the money I needed to continue my\nstudies. I thought it wasn\u2019t a bad idea, so I applied for it. My salary was neither enough for home\nneeds nor to save money for education which is why I had to continue my job for couple more years. <\/p>One day our distant relative came to our home and told us that he lend money to my father for my\noperation when I met with an accident in my childhood. He has all the documents which my father\nsigned in it. I had no other choice except to return him the money. It took almost four years to clear\nthem and I even got promoted in the meantime.\u201d <\/p>\u201cYou must have had all the money you needed for the studies right. Why didn\u2019t you go for your\ndream after you got promoted?\u201d I asked intentionally. \u201cYes. After the year the debt was settled, I had\nthe money I needed.\u201d He said. \u201cThen, what happened?\u201d\nHe leaned back and continued \u201cThere was no guarantee that no other problem would show up if I go.\nI didn\u2019t want to lose a secured job. I didn\u2019t want to hurt my mother anymore\u201d he took a deep breath\nand said \u201cI gave up.\u201d <\/p>I don\u2019t know what to say then. So many questions were running in my mind when he completed\nsaying. But he already gave an answer with one sentence. Yes, there was no guarantee. What if\nsomething bad happened and he needed help but nobody is there to help him if he goes for studies?\nMaybe he was right. He has taken the correct decision by giving up. <\/p>\u201cDon\u2019t think so much about that kid. So, what you want to become?\u201d he asked by breaking the\nsilence.<\/p>\u201cActor, I want to become an actor.\u201d I replied. \u201cGreat. My wishes will always be with you kid. Good\nluck for your future\u201d he said that and checked his wrist watch \u201cAh! It is time for me to go. Goodbye \nkid.\u201d He then touched my hand and said \u201cNo matter what happens in future, never blame or regret\nyour decisions. Because it wasn\u2019t decision\u2019s fault, it was situation\u2019s. If you blame your decision, that\nmeans you are blaming your past and that means you\u2019re blaming yourself. Never do that.\u201d He then\ntook his walking stick and went away. <\/p>\u2018He gave up his dream because he has money problem. I don\u2019t have any such thing, I don\u2019t have to\nworry about that and I\u2019ll definitely become an actor one day.\u2019 I thought when he was moving away\nfrom my eye sight. <\/p>From then, I kept that old man\u2019s words in my head and did all the things I have to do to become an\nactor. I used to go for acting classes every day and come up to this hill to practice more. Sometimes\nmy dad takes me to the senior actors to learn from them. Slowly I started getting roles in small\nbudget movies. I did so many side character roles and gave my best for them but no one recognized\nme for that. After few days one assistant director came for my father\u2019s help. In exchange, my father\nintroduced me to him and showed some of my acting tapes. He got impressed and offered me an\naudition for the important character in movie. He told me the character\u2019s personality and informed\nme that the audition is in a week.\nI was very excited for the role and practiced so hard for that. On the audition day, almost twenty\nguys auditioned with me. After seeing everyone, the assistant director came to me and said \u201cYou are\nso suitable for this one. You\u2019ll become a good actor.\u201d I still remember those words. It was very fun\ndoing it. I got very good appreciations when the movie hit theaters. <\/p>Once a director, who directed two good films came to me with a script which is a love story and\noffered me a lead role in the film. I hopped like a kangaroo that day. After we completed the final\ndraft of the script, director and I started searching for a producer for the film. Because of being a\nnew hero and a non-famous director, no one stepped in to produce. Knowing that, my dad proposed\nthat he\u2019ll produce it. <\/p>Our whole team worked so hard for the film and we completed production and post-production work\nwithin one year. I watched the film with cast and crew before its initial release. Everyone loved it,\neven my dad. I think for the first time in my life, I saw the real happiness on my father\u2019s face. The\nnight before its release, my father was selling the movie to distributors and I was eagerly waiting for\nthe audience response.<\/p>Suddenly, the next day, out of nowhere, there was a curfew in the city. Nobody was supposed to\ncome out from their home. The curfew took a week to stop and distributors lost their money by then,\nso the screens got reduced, but still I had a hope. I turned on the TV hoping for reviews. A critic\nmade fun on our movie which got viral and nobody had seen it because that was a time where people\nbelieve media more than the fellow human. The day I\u2019ve been waiting since my childhood wasn\u2019t\nsupposed to be that. <\/p>It took months for me to move on from the tragedy. Later I auditioned for so many roles but I ain\u2019t\ngot one. I waited years for a chance, but there\u2019s no use. No one chose me, they didn\u2019t even consider \nme. One day I came up here and think a lot and finally I decided to move on from acting. It broke my\nheart while doing so. I started looking after my father\u2019s business. <\/p>People tell me that I would have waited some more. I would\u2019ve got a chance if I did. But I gave up and\nit doesn\u2019t mean that I am not happy after I did. In fact I\u2019m glad that I didn\u2019t stop there. I don\u2019t blame\nmy decisions, because once an old man told me that decisions aren\u2019t wrong, situations are. <\/p>\u201cIt\u2019s getting late, C\u2019mon grandpa! Let\u2019s go.\u201d She said and held my hand. We\u2019re walking slowly\ntowards the stairs. \u201cGrandpa, did you know? My friends praised me today while I was playing\nbadminton. They told me that I\u2019d become a good badminton player in future.\u201d <\/p>More than a million people in the world achieved their dreams. They don\u2019t give up till the end. But\npeople like me did what we have to do in that situation. For some, their passion fades away\nthroughout the time. For some, they try hard and hard, but there won\u2019t be any use, like me. For\nsome, they don\u2019t have any other choice except to give up, like the old man. <\/p>\u201cWhat are you thinking grandpa?\u201d She asked <\/p>\u201cNothing\u201d <\/p>\u201cTell me. Will I become a badminton player in future?\u201d <\/p>She may or may not become a badminton player. It\u2019s her choice to whether give up or not but what if\nshe doesn\u2019t. Life is all about a small hope. I rubbed her hair little bit and checked my surroundings. I\ntold her to close her eyes and count fifty. I went to a sports shop near me and bought a badminton\nracket for her. I slowly kneeled in front of her handed that racket and said <\/p>\u201cYou will, darling. You will.\u201d<\/p>"}]

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