Like Tylenol: a medicine which can heal the pain. This place is a pain healer for me. To come over top of this small hill, one has to climb almost of hundred stairs. In middle, there are shops like canteen, Sports, Toys etc. There is a circular footpath where people walk and jog. It covers all the edges of the hill and there’s a huge place inside the path where kids can play a lot of games. Inside it, benches are placed here and there randomly. They say that the olds come up here to relax, adults for jogging, teens to love, kids to play. But I come up here to know, learn, suggest and scold myself. “You’re too slow. C’mon grandpa! Only ten more stairs left” shouted my granddaughter from the top stair. “I know. Coming darling” I shouted back. 

After few seconds 

“See. Your grandfather has not aged.” I said. “Ha ha ha, remind me later, I’ll laugh harder” she replied in a sarcastic tone and went to her friend and I decided to take a walk in the footpath. After completion of my walk I was searching for an empty bench to relax. I saw kids playing football then a memory flashed in my head. 

Six decades before, on one summer evening. I slipped and got my back hurt while kicking the football right here. My friends laughed at me and saw an embarrassing expression on my face and yet, they didn’t stopped laughing. I tried to stand on my feet, but I couldn’t. One of them came and helped me to get up. “Oh buddy! Why did you do that? No one asked you to make us laugh right?” he chuckled. “Please stop” I replied with a fake laugh. He kept my left arm around his shoulders, brought me to this bench and helped me to sit beside an old man, then went back to continue the game. 

The old man seemed peaceful and he was keenly observing everything that happening around there. He was holding a walking stick with his two hands by pressing it vertically opposite to the ground. He had really cool specs which are similar to the specs where Clark Kent had them in the Superman movie. Surprisingly the hair on his ears was longer than the hair on his scalp. Every inch of his skin got wrinkled. Suddenly he turned his head towards me and said “Do I look scary?” in a grumbling voice. I cleared my throat twice and said “What? No!” 

“Then why are you looking at me like that from the moment you came here?” 

Then I realized that he was observing me too. “Uh.. Nothing, I was uh.. I was just” He raised his right hand little bit and said “wait” then looked at the sky and watched a plane flying over us. He slowly moved his head above and above “Ouch! It hurts” he cried. He kept his hand at the backside of his neck and turned back to watch the plane again. He watched it until it got away from our sight and he came back to his position. 

“How old are you kid?” 

“Fourteen. I have a question.” 

“Go ahead.” 

“Why did you look at that plane like it was your first time to watch a flying object?” 

“When I was your age, it is my dream to become a pilot. But I ended up as a bank employee.” “Why? What happened?” I asked softly. “Hah!” he laughed and kept his walking stick in middle of the bench and then he continued “The thing is, we wait for the future we dream and are passionate about. But the truth is, the future we are going to have is waiting to depress or surprise us. Future is not what you think kid, it is what you do. 

My father was a worker in a bottle manufacturing company. He started saving money for the admission by working more shifts than he used to, when I told him that I want to do a degree in bachelor’s aircraft operation. When I completed my twelfth grade he was affected by an infection and eventually we used all the money he saved for my education. But unfortunately that money wasn’t enough to save him. He answered the call of death by leaving us. 

Later I wrote some entrance tests and I got one, but we didn’t have the affordability to continue my education in that university, so I’ve stopped my studies. After some days my mother suggested me to apply for a bank job, so that couple of years later I would have the money I needed to continue my studies. I thought it wasn’t a bad idea, so I applied for it. My salary was neither enough for home needs nor to save money for education which is why I had to continue my job for couple more years. 

One day our distant relative came to our home and told us that he lend money to my father for my operation when I met with an accident in my childhood. He has all the documents which my father signed in it. I had no other choice except to return him the money. It took almost four years to clear them and I even got promoted in the meantime.” 

“You must have had all the money you needed for the studies right. Why didn’t you go for your dream after you got promoted?” I asked intentionally. “Yes. After the year the debt was settled, I had the money I needed.” He said. “Then, what happened?” He leaned back and continued “There was no guarantee that no other problem would show up if I go. I didn’t want to lose a secured job. I didn’t want to hurt my mother anymore” he took a deep breath and said “I gave up.” 

I don’t know what to say then. So many questions were running in my mind when he completed saying. But he already gave an answer with one sentence. Yes, there was no guarantee. What if something bad happened and he needed help but nobody is there to help him if he goes for studies? Maybe he was right. He has taken the correct decision by giving up. 

“Don’t think so much about that kid. So, what you want to become?” he asked by breaking the silence.

“Actor, I want to become an actor.” I replied. “Great. My wishes will always be with you kid. Good luck for your future” he said that and checked his wrist watch “Ah! It is time for me to go. Goodbye kid.” He then touched my hand and said “No matter what happens in future, never blame or regret your decisions. Because it wasn’t decision’s fault, it was situation’s. If you blame your decision, that means you are blaming your past and that means you’re blaming yourself. Never do that.” He then took his walking stick and went away. 

‘He gave up his dream because he has money problem. I don’t have any such thing, I don’t have to worry about that and I’ll definitely become an actor one day.’ I thought when he was moving away from my eye sight. 

From then, I kept that old man’s words in my head and did all the things I have to do to become an actor. I used to go for acting classes every day and come up to this hill to practice more. Sometimes my dad takes me to the senior actors to learn from them. Slowly I started getting roles in small budget movies. I did so many side character roles and gave my best for them but no one recognized me for that. After few days one assistant director came for my father’s help. In exchange, my father introduced me to him and showed some of my acting tapes. He got impressed and offered me an audition for the important character in movie. He told me the character’s personality and informed me that the audition is in a week. I was very excited for the role and practiced so hard for that. On the audition day, almost twenty guys auditioned with me. After seeing everyone, the assistant director came to me and said “You are so suitable for this one. You’ll become a good actor.” I still remember those words. It was very fun doing it. I got very good appreciations when the movie hit theaters. 

Once a director, who directed two good films came to me with a script which is a love story and offered me a lead role in the film. I hopped like a kangaroo that day. After we completed the final draft of the script, director and I started searching for a producer for the film. Because of being a new hero and a non-famous director, no one stepped in to produce. Knowing that, my dad proposed that he’ll produce it. 

Our whole team worked so hard for the film and we completed production and post-production work within one year. I watched the film with cast and crew before its initial release. Everyone loved it, even my dad. I think for the first time in my life, I saw the real happiness on my father’s face. The night before its release, my father was selling the movie to distributors and I was eagerly waiting for the audience response.

Suddenly, the next day, out of nowhere, there was a curfew in the city. Nobody was supposed to come out from their home. The curfew took a week to stop and distributors lost their money by then, so the screens got reduced, but still I had a hope. I turned on the TV hoping for reviews. A critic made fun on our movie which got viral and nobody had seen it because that was a time where people believe media more than the fellow human. The day I’ve been waiting since my childhood wasn’t supposed to be that. 

It took months for me to move on from the tragedy. Later I auditioned for so many roles but I ain’t got one. I waited years for a chance, but there’s no use. No one chose me, they didn’t even consider me. One day I came up here and think a lot and finally I decided to move on from acting. It broke my heart while doing so. I started looking after my father’s business. 

People tell me that I would have waited some more. I would’ve got a chance if I did. But I gave up and it doesn’t mean that I am not happy after I did. In fact I’m glad that I didn’t stop there. I don’t blame my decisions, because once an old man told me that decisions aren’t wrong, situations are. 

“It’s getting late, C’mon grandpa! Let’s go.” She said and held my hand. We’re walking slowly towards the stairs. “Grandpa, did you know? My friends praised me today while I was playing badminton. They told me that I’d become a good badminton player in future.” 

More than a million people in the world achieved their dreams. They don’t give up till the end. But people like me did what we have to do in that situation. For some, their passion fades away throughout the time. For some, they try hard and hard, but there won’t be any use, like me. For some, they don’t have any other choice except to give up, like the old man. 

“What are you thinking grandpa?” She asked 

“Nothing” 

“Tell me. Will I become a badminton player in future?” 

She may or may not become a badminton player. It’s her choice to whether give up or not but what if she doesn’t. Life is all about a small hope. I rubbed her hair little bit and checked my surroundings. I told her to close her eyes and count fifty. I went to a sports shop near me and bought a badminton racket for her. I slowly kneeled in front of her handed that racket and said 

“You will, darling. You will.”